Legends of Dominance - 58

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This article is part of 'The Legends Project'

As part of the "Legends Project", Legends of Dominance - 58 has been recognized as an BDSM Icon
for the work they have done to make the BDSM/LGBT/Leather communities what they are today and awarded a

Certificate of Appreciation

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This article is a Biography
Race Bannon


Race Bannon is a long-time community leader. Some of his accomplishments include founder and Director of Kink Aware Professionals, a non-profit professional referral service; Project Leader for The DSM Project, which led to a change in the way the psycho-therapeutic profession officially views kinky sexuality; author of Learning The Ropes: A Basic Guide to Safe and Fun SM Lovemaking, an international bestseller in the genre; founder and former owner of Daedalus Publishing Company, the first publishing company dedicated to publishing quality non-fiction books on leather/SM/fetish topics; writer of many articles on sexuality; former sex advice columnist, former producer and host of Bound To Talk, the first Internet talk show focusing on kinky sex; and past Board member of NLA International, NLA Los Angeles, and Avatar. Race is regularly interviewed by the press, radio, and television as an expert on kinky sexuality and he has spoken to thousands of people at over 300 speaking engagements. Race lives in San Francisco.

SENSUOUS SADIE: The foundation of today's BDSM culture was the gay leather community and the "old guard." With BDSM increasingly being mainstreamed, what do you feel has been lost or gained in the process of the last 20 or 30 years?

RACE: "I believe we can always benefit from taking the best of what something has to offer and leaving the rest behind. That’s how I treat the old guard mentality. Without a doubt, the old guard gave me a great sense of respect for my play partners. It taught me the importance of safety and mentoring others. My old guard background forged in me a love of hyper-masculine sexuality for which I’m eternally grateful. But I also know the old guard had a downside.

"Some in the old guard were a bit too stodgy. Innovation and experimentation wasn’t always looked upon kindly. Roles were often rigid and not bending to the unique personality each man possessed.

"But I don’t think anything’s been lost. The old guard was a natural, organic phase in the development of the gay male kink scene. It served us well and taught us plenty. But we must move on. We must progress if we’re to keep the scene interesting and personally relevant."

Sadie: There's quite a bit of discussion as to differences in the Old Guard versus the more contemporary styles of BDSM. Where would you put yourself in this continuum? In what ways does the gay leather community still differ greatly from the straight one? What things are the same?

Race: "I guess I’d describe myself as an old guard type who’s allowed himself to grow. While I’m grateful for what the old guard culture brought to my life, I also recognize that it has its limitations too. Of course, some of my old guard friends consider me very much new guard. Ultimately, labels don’t matter that much. I’m at a point in my life where I do my sexuality my way, whatever way feels right at the time.

"The very nature of gay, lesbian, bisexual, or heterosexual groupings is that they inevitably differ in consistent ways. The leather community is no different. I often find heterosexuals in the scene a bit more free in their play. They seem extremely comfortable with a wide variety of play styles and roles. I admire that. The lesbians I know in the scene seem to foster intense and focused partnerings with the people they play with and I admire that. Gay men can play with a certain finesse that pleasures the aesthetic side of me. So yes, I see differences, but I’d never say any approach was superior. And truthfully, those of us in the kink scene, regardless of orientation, share a lot more in common than we have differences."

Sadie: The coming out of the BDSM community has often been compared to the coming out of the gay/lesbian community twenty years ago. Do you think this simile is an apt one? What will we face that will be easier or more difficult than what the gay community faced historically?

Race: "I believe there is a distinct difference in the two coming out experiences. While some kinky men and women do consider their primary sexual identity to be kinky, most do not. For most, kinky sex is but one of many pleasures they enjoy in life; it’s not an identity. But when gays and lesbians come out, they almost universally experience an immediate sense of identity that grows more clear throughout life. It is who they are, not just what they do.

"So I believe it unlikely that society will accept kinky folks to the same extent they’ve accepted gays and lesbians, mostly because kinky folks often just aren’t as motivated to come out as are gays and lesbians. However, I still think there’s tremendous value in coming out as a kinky person. Each coming out event spawns further discussion about the true nature of being kinky, and that’s a great outcome. And I advocate as many kinky folks coming out as possible, assuming their life situation allows for it, because it will improve their lives and the lives of others. Lies are never healthy. Convenient, even safe at times, but not healthy."

Sadie: How would you describe your personal BDSM practice? Any particular interests or passions you'd like to share?

Race: "My interests are varied and broad. With few exceptions, I find most scenes interesting. Most would describe me as a versatile top or master, which means I function primarily as a top but have grown to also appreciate the pleasures of the other side of the equation. In other words, I’m an opportunist. As for the specifics of my personal BDSM life, I leave that between me and the people I play with."

Sadie: Do you feel that there is a connection between the "space" of BDSM play and spiritual spaces? Do you integrate any spiritual techniques into your play?

Race: "My life is grounded in an intense, but common sense approach to spirituality. Spirituality pervades my life and I think it pervades anyone’s life if they agree to allow it in. I do yoga every day and always try to feed my spiritual self. And BDSM play can be a part of life’s spiritual experiences. My only reservation with linking up the spiritual and the sexual in this way is that some people will tend to deny the raw, sexual passions and desires, subjugating them in favor of what is often seen as the more acceptable, spiritual experience. It is, after all, sex. We can enjoy the more base sexual instincts with no further pretense. And if someone wants to add spirituality to the mix, how great that it works for them. But no one should ever deem a spiritual approach to BDSM as superior to a more visceral approach. They’re just different."

Sadie: You have completed two books now. What are you planning for your next book? Is writing "work" for you, or is it something of an inner drive?

Race: "Currently, I’m writing a book different than anything I’ve written before. It would fall into the self-help/motivational category. I’m not sure when it will be done. Since I work almost exclusively as a writer, I write a lot. Whether I’m writing a magazine article, a computer software manual, or marketing copy for a large corporation, I’m writing just about every day. It’s great that it pays the bills, but it sometimes distracts from some of the personal writing I want to do. I think that, in time, I’ll configure my life so that I can write more of my own books. I do make a living as a writer, so I guess I should not complain. And yes, writing is work for me. But I like to work."

Sadie: You write in your introduction to your best-selling book Learning the Ropes, "S/M has long been a much misunderstood style of erotic play." Why do you think that this is so particularly true for BDSM? Do you believe there is hope that in twenty years we will become accepted in the wider community?

Race: "BDSM will most certainly become more accepted as time passes. That is inevitable. Whenever myth and prejudice are replaced with knowledge and personal association, minds change. With the higher profile of BDSM in mainstream life, at least in American and European culture, BDSM will break down some barriers and gain more acceptance.

"As for why BDSM has historically been misunderstood, it’s because it was treated as something shameful. Any group that keeps their true nature hidden must inevitably engender misunderstanding amongst those who know of it. To the uninitiated and ignorant, BDSM can be scary and forbidding."

Sadie: It's been said about this book that you avoid the "This is the One True Way" attitude that characterizes so much BDSM literature. Where do you draw the line on what is acceptable or unacceptable play? For example, in one of your columns you discuss the issues of using drugs and alcohol during play, and encourage the reader to make an educated decision. Many SadieC hard liners would have serious issues with your being this loosey goosey about something which can compromise both safety and consent. What are your thoughts on this?

Race: "I like to think I’m grounded in reality. The reality I see doesn’t contain a single, correct way to be kinky. It must ultimately be about what pleases you and your partner. My reality also very much embraces the safe, sane, and consensual credo. I truly do believe that a scene should be all of those things.

"As for what is acceptable or not, that’s a tricky one. I feel like I’m posing as God if I dictate specific behaviors to others just because I might personally believe them to be important. The alcohol and drug issue is a perfect case in point. I recognize there might be some people who can have a couple of beers or smoke a joint and still be very much in control. Would I suggest they do something risky? No. Would I suggest they avoid types of play requiring precision. Yes. Do I believe everyone functions identically when exposed to such substances. No. For some people, indulging in such intoxicants during play is ill advised. I know this can be controversial because some in the leather/SM/fetish scene see safe, sane, and consensual in absolute terms. I don’t.

"I recall the time I heard three men talking about safe ways to paddle a butt. The first guy said the safe way was not to leave a lasting mark. The second guy disagreed and said the safe way was simply not to break the skin to blood, but that a mark was certainly acceptable. The third guy disagreed with them both and said he didn’t mind paddling someone to the point of a little blood if his partner was OK with it. Who was right? Well, they all were. They were right for themselves because they knew the standards of behavior they personally felt were appropriate. And certainly there are some BDSM practices that simply cannot deviate from acceptable, safe play. Piercing might be one good example. You can’t pierce someone without taking certain health precautions and still consider it safe.

"I fear absolutes. Absolutes can often imprison as much as they liberate. An individual’s sexuality is not an absolute thing. We must educate and inform people to the best of our ability and then trust their judgment to use the knowledge they have to pursue their sexuality in a way that’s safe, sane, and consensual for them and their partner."

Sadie: In your chapter The Playground of the Mind, you write about using your mind to make a scene more effective. What techniques do you suggest?

Race: "Think like a kid. Kids like to play. And no matter how serious or dark a BDSM scene might get, it’s still play. Kids are incredibly creative. Their inventive minds continually create worlds and scenarios they find entertaining. If all adults could do the same, everyone’s sexuality would be more satisfying."

Sadie: You used to write a Q&A column for International Leatherman. What issues were the most common that you are asked? Do you feel the questions and problems faced are pretty much the same within the gay community and the rest of the BDSM culture?

Race: "The most common questions asked, by far, were about relationships. Not surprisingly, the issues that seem to challenge all relationships, kinky or not, were the most prevalent. Trust, self exposure, intimacy, communication, and love topped the list of topics in the letters and emails I received. The same issues affect everyone involved in BDSM. And in the future as knowledge of the specifics of BDSM techniques become even more prevalent, relationship issues will still be foremost on people’s minds. After all, sex, including BDSM, is ultimately about bonding and connecting with another human being."

Sadie: You've written in your column that fire play is more commonly practiced in the lesbian BDSM community. Why do you think this is? Are there other kinds of play that you are aware of that tend to be practiced more in certain subgroups?

Race: "I’m not sure why fire play was more prevalent in the lesbian community. Not that many years ago, temporary piercing was also not practiced much outside of the lesbian community. All that has changed. Now men and women of all orientations seem to enjoy just about every type of play."

Sadie: You write that, "Few men I know who flag top are always top and few men I know that flag bottom are always bottom. Versatility, at least to some extent, is the norm rather than the exception." And yet it's not uncommon to be criticized for being a switch, because that supposedly indicates a lack of decisiveness, similar to the bias against bisexuality. To what do you attribute these apparently contradictory ideas?

Race: "I think there’s a part of us that romanticizes the exclusive top or bottom. After all, that polarizes the roles distinctly and that can increase the erotic appeal. Think about it. Movies and television present relationships in an unrealistic, romanticized way. Why? Because that’s what we want to see. We want our fantasies. BDSM is no different. But just as we must realize that the images we see on television are not real, no matter how much we enjoy them, we must also realize that the distinct categorization of everyone in the BDSM scene into top and bottom camps is not realistic either. Sure, there are a few men and women who reside in the exclusive camps, but they’re relatively few in number. And if you subtract those that remain exclusively top or bottom due to peer pressure rather than true personal preference, the numbers are even smaller.

"The point is that everyone should pursue their sexuality exactly as they see fit, whether that means being exclusively in one role or versatility. There’s an old Hindu spiritual perspective that there are many paths up the mountain to the same peak. So it is with sexuality.

"As for the criticisms that some assault others with regarding switching, such criticisms stem from ignorance. In fact, the truly experienced among us rarely criticize switches because their experience has proven that different approaches seem to work well for different people. And such criticisms seem to be dwindling over time. Perhaps this is because we’re a lot more knowledgeable and informed as a community than we were in times past.

Sadie: You founded and direct Kink Aware Professionals (KAP), a privately funded, non-profit service dedicated to providing the community with referrals to psycho-therapeutic, medical, dental, complementary healing, and legal professionals who are knowledgeable about and sensitive to diverse expressions of sexuality. What do you see as the main advantages of utilizing a professional person who is familiar with our lifestyle?

Race: "KAP’s initial mission was to provide psycho-therapeutic referrals to professionals that wouldn’t judge a person by their kinky sexuality. It’s still KAP’s primary mission, although the mission has expanded over the years to include some other professionals.

"In many situations, it is a necessity to have a psycho-therapeutic professional who understands your sexuality. If they do not, then there is always the risk that a psychotherapist will erroneously determine that one’s sexuality is the problem when it could likely be some other aspect of your life.

"The same situation can occur with some other professionals, such as medical doctors, which is why KAP expanded its mission to include them.

"And for your readers who don’t know how to reach KAP, you’ll find it at http://www.bannon.com/kap."

Sadie: You were the President of Daedalus Publishing Company, one of only a handful of BDSM publishers, and sold it two years ago. What were the unique challenges of publishing material in such a specialized niche? With what might even be considered a glut of "how to" manuals, what areas of writing are still to be explored fully?

Race: "Daedalus is thriving under the new owner. It can be challenging to publish books of this genre, but it also has advantages. The biggest challenge is distribution beyond the adult retail establishment. Mainstream retail outlets tend to shy away from such material. However, books published for the leather/SM/fetish reader have a clearly defined market and that’s a big advantage if you know how to reach that market.

"As for the perceived glut of how to books, I really don’t see that as a problem. There will always be someone who knows how to present better information or the same information in a more compelling way. So I think all areas of leather/SM/fetish sexuality still have lots of books yet to be written about them."

Sadie: You were also involved with the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. What is it about this group particularly that motivated you to donate your time? What kind of work did you do for them?

Race: "I was on their board briefly, but unfortunately my schedule didn’t allow me to continue. However, I admire their work and feel they’re one of the important civil liberties advocate groups operating today. We’re all better off for the work they do."

Sadie: Is there anything else you'd like to share with our readers?

Race: "I’d like to encourage others to do sex their own way. The information in books, articles, and workshops should not be considered templates that you must apply to your own sexuality. I liken sex to art. One may go to art school to learn the basics, but if the student doesn’t move beyond the basics to personalize them in some way, true art can never be achieved."

Sadie: Thank you very much!


Sensuous Sadie is the author of It's Not About the Whip: Love, Sex, and Spirituality in the BDSM Scene (http://www.trafford.com/robots/03-0551.html). She is the founder and leader (1999 - 2001) of Rose & Thorn , Vermont 's first BDSM group. Comments, compliments and complaints, as well as requests for reprinting can be addressed to her at SensuousSadie@aol.com or visit her website at www.sensuoussadie.com. Sadie believes the universe is abundant, and that sharing information freely is part of this abundance, so she allows reprints of her writing in most venues.

Copyright 2003 Sadie Sez Publications

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